1000 English Funny Jokes || english jokes 2024
A joke is a brief narrative or an account of an amusing incident, often with a punch line, that is told to provoke laughter or divert attention. Jokes can be based on wordplay, humorously exaggerated situations, or can simply be statements that are meant to be taken as humorous. Jokes are a common form of entertainment and are often told in social settings such as parties, at gatherings, or online.You can find savage jokes in English as English language add some kind of feel to the jokes. Do you also love to read and share english funny jokes? Then your search ends here. Don't look further for the same here and there. Jokes can be reason for your hook with someone, it can help you start with someone. You can even
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- Doctor’s Appointment
Chintu: Let’s Go For Movie.
Mintu: Shit, I’ve Got A Doctor’s Appointment Today..
Chintu: Just Cancel It,Tell Him You’re Sick.
- call the wife
What do you call the wife of a hippie?
A Mississippi. - tissue dance
Q: How do you make a tissue dance?
A: Put a little boogie in it. - belt sent to jail
Why was the belt sent to jail?
For holding up a pair of pants! - A bank robber
A bank robber pulls out gun points it at the teller, and says, “Give me all the money or you’re geography!” The puzzled teller replies, “Did you mean to say ‘or you’re history?'” The robber says, “Don’t change the subject!”
- Sun or Australia
Teacher: Which one is closer, Sun or Australia?
Student: Sun
Teacher: Why?
Student: We can see the sun all the time, but can’t see Australia. - from your bank account
Man: I could go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?
Man: I offer you myself.
Woman: I am sorry I never accept cheap gifts.
Man: I want to share everything with you.
Woman: Let’s start from your bank account. - addicted to soap
I used to be addicted to soap.
But I’m clean now. - bottles in one hand
Math Teacher: “If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other hand, what do I have?”
Student: “A drinking problem.” - young boy came home
A young boy came home from school and told his mother,
“I had a big fight with my classmate. He called me a sissy.” The mother asked, “What did you do?”
The boy replied, “I hit him with my purse!” - your face I know
A: Look at your face I know what you had for breakfast
B: What was it?
A: Eggs.
B: No, that was yesterday. - Sarah goes to school
Sarah goes to school, and the teacher says, “Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class.
Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?” Sarah waves her hand, “Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!”
Miss Rogers says, “All right, Sarah, what is your multi-syllable word?” Sarah says,
“Mas-tur-bate.” Miss Rogers smiles and says, “Wow, Sarah, that’s a mouthful.” Sarah says, “No, Miss Rogers, you’re thinking of a blowjob.” - frog’s car
What happens to a frog’s car when it breaks down?
It gets toad away. - getting larger
I couldn’t figure out why the baseball
kept getting larger. Then it hit me. - invented knock knock
Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a no bell prize.
- nose runs
Why is it that your nose runs, but your feet smell?
- leopard
Q: Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek?
A: Because he was always spotted. - income tax return
A man admitted he lied on his
income tax return: he listed
himself as the head of the household! - city zoo
My grandfather had the heart of lion and a
lifetime ban from the New your city zoo. - one hand and 10 oranges
Q: If you have 13 apples in one hand and 10 oranges in the other, what do you have?
A: Big hands.