one line funny birthday wishes
May your hair dye and mascara never run! Happy Birthday, old lady!
If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas!
Smart, good looking, and funny. But enough about me. Happy birthday!????
Congratulations on getting slightly older!
Well done – you have still been alive for several years!
Happy birthday – I’m so glad you’ll always be older than me
Remember that growing old is mandatory, but growing up is optional!
It is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer.????
Cheers to a woman who has been thirty, fifty times!
Happy birthday –???? So far, this is the oldest you’ve ever been!
At least you’re not as old as you will be next year… if you make it!
If anyone calls you old, hit them with your cane and throw your teeth at them!
Happy Birthday???? to an ancient woman! Someday, you will tell me what it was like to build Stonehenge!
When you were born, the sun shone… for the very first time!
Another year older and you’re one step closer to getting those Velcro shoes!
Remember that age is just a number… just a really, REALLY high one in your case!
I regret to inform you that your childhood has EXPIRED.
Before there were maps, people used the stars to guide them. You would know!
Today, friend, count your blessings, not your years. You don’t have that kind of time!
Friend, you really exemplify a phrase, for me! Long in the tooth, comes to mind!
Now is the time to tell you what you truly are, friend! An old geezer!
Happy Birthday, friend! Age is not a big deal… to me! I’m still young!
Happy Birthday, friend! You are as old as you are dear to me!
Today, my friend, you have made me grateful for something…that I’m not the oldest person here!
Friend, on this day of the year, many, many years ago, you were born! I guess that’s something!
Friend, I hope that a million birthday???? wishes come true for you! It will match your age!
Today friend, you should be glad! You can paint on canvas and not in a cave!
On this date friend, you might ache a little more. That is because you are old!
Remembering you today, friend, is easy! The sheer number of your years is astounding!
funny birthday wishes in english
Happy Birthday to the woman who has it all! One hundred years of accumulation would result in that!
I always limit my budget on buying birthday gifts according to what that person gave me as a gift on my birthday. Enjoy your gift of nothing!
Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday ????I can remember without a Facebook reminder.
Forget about the past, you can’t change it. Forget about the future, you can’t predict it. Forget about the present, I didn’t get you one.
May your Facebook wall be filled with birthday wishes from people you’ve never met, haven’t seen in years, or genuinely couldn’t care less about.
On your birthday don’t forget to set goals that are sky high, and spend the rest of the year miserably trying to build a rocket to get there.
You’re a really hard individual to shop for… so I didn’t get you anything. Happy birthday!????
Happy birthday to the only person I would rescue in the event of a zombie apocalypse.
Right, let’s get you so drunk that you end up believing it’s my birthday ????and buying me drinks all night ????
Happy birthday! Can you believe we used to think people our age were adults and had their life in order?
Birthdays are like spotting Bigfoot. You really do want to see them but you’re a little afraid of what they’ll look like…
If you look back through all the years you’ve lived, the first thing you’ll notice is that you need a telescope.
Yes, we have reached that age… when every compliment we get is usually followed by ‘for your age’. You’re still looking great though… for your age!
As you get older, three things happen. The first thing is your memory goes, and I can’t remember the other two.
Congratulations! You are now old enough to need TWO packs of candles for your cake.
We all knew this day was coming. It’s best to just suck it up and accept it’s no longer acceptable for you to eat a happy meal in public.
Don’t worry about your age… alcohol will make it all better!
I will stop making age jokes on your birthday now… you’ve reached the age where it’s genuinely not funny anymore.
Just remember the more candles on the cake, the bigger the cake you’ll get! Now who’s laughing?
Friend, don’t mind me, but ask anyone and they’ll tell you the same: calling you young would be a mistake! A HUGE mistake!
Cheers to a friend who can tell me when bread was only five cents!
As your friend, I am here to remind you of significant things! Like ‘always save money for retirement’!
Friend, some people are obsessed with age! Like me! I can’t believe how old you are!
If I tried to count up to your age today, I would go hoarse! Happy Birthday,???? buddy!
Happy Birthday, friend! You were educated in the old ways! The pyramids wouldn’t have been built without you!
Happy Birthday to a friend who is unforgettable! Mainly because you are the grayest one here!
Dear friend, I know you know who I am, but I hope you get tons of wishes from all those other vain people on social media who call themselves your ‘friends’, too.
I was going to send your gift in the mail, but the mail service said I weighed too much, so here I am.
Hey bestie, I know you are sad about your age this year, but no worries- I’m here to blow out your candles for you so you can feel like a real kid again!
We have stuck by each other through thick and thin. We’ve been there for each other all these years and we’re still two girls who are better together than apart. That says something, don’t you think? Stay fabulous, babe.
Wait, you are how old? Oh jeez, that’s almost dead in doggy years. I’m so glad we met when we’re kids. Happy birthday, bestie.????
I love you, girl, and I’m wishing you the best today. However, if you ever blackmail me for any reason, remember I still have those graduation photos of you.
Happy Birthday to a friend that has no secrets from me but always fills in her ‘birth date’ field alone.
Looking at you fills me with hope! A woman can live to be a hundred!
best funny birthday wishes in english
Mirror, mirror, on the wall, pay attention to the question and watch out what you are going to say about this glorious woman’s birthday!????
Girl, you look amazingly young for your age, but remember we went to school together. Best wishes!
Cheers to a woman who has dyed her hair so many times, she doesn’t remember what its original color is!
Here is to all the years that you have been alive, and the cake budget we cut down, just because candles cost a lot! Happy Birthday, woman!
There is something that makes you stand out, woman! I know what it is: your age!
Today, girl, there are things to marvel at! Like the length of time that you have been here!
You are a woman whose very presence makes others happy! Thanks for reminding us that we’re not as old as you!
Happy Birthday,???? woman! Sometimes, I feel like you have been around, forever! (That’s because you have!)
Looking at you, woman, reminds me of a simpler time. Like, before there was electricity!
